While watching the Academy Awards, the diet coke commercial that advertises the contest for the dress that Heidi Klum wore down the red carpet.
Her: Without Panties!
Me: I bet it smells so good.
The other night I dragged the Girly Girl outside to stand with me as I had a smoke. She was a bit on the chilly side, so I moved the scarf from my neck to hers. It looked good, the orange and grey of the scarf matching almost perfectly with her grey and black outfit.
But it was cold. And she complained that I was a terrorist making her stand outside like that.
And I could only respond, “It goes well with my diet.”
Scene: My girly girl has just arrived home from work. I’m in her bed and she curls up next to me. I start to rub her back and make it down to her bum crack. (Not in the bum crack, just to the top)
Her: My coin slot!
Me: That’s really funny, because I heard a joke today about a roll of quarters.
Her: Like, “Is that a roll of quarters or are you just happy to see me?”
Me: Yep, exactly. Where should I put MY roll of quarters?
Her: In my coin slot!
And then we erupt in laughter.
Me: We should blog this.
I have a GIANT hangover… ha ha no Perfect Patriots.
Today I went to the ticker tape parade, but there was less confetti and more people just throwing shit out of their windows. But I got lots of good footage
And getting there sucked. None of the trains were stopping, but the MTA wasn’t making any announcements. Couldn’t they just say, “There’s a security threat because there are too many people so we’re not running”. People must having been waiting for a long time because there was a huge crowd on the platform.
There are probably still people waiting on that platform.
